just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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