Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
It's blow job season.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
