let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
