We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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