I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
