all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
