i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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