we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
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