Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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