barbara walters just said penis...
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
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