Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
