he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
