all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
