I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
