I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
