I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
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