he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
smell my finger.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
