We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
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