Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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