Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize