I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
