In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize
