a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize