he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Randomize
