So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
