yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
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