She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
that is very illegal...i love you.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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