Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
