I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
my sisters under your porch take her home
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
You know, be my cock's hype man.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize