I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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