I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
