You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Sex in the backyard? Check.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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