you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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