We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
