My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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