but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
