Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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