Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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