I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
do nipples grow back?
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