it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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