It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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