The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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