We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
