But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
