Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
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