Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Randomize
