I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
