I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
