Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
You're like the curious george of whores
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
