I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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